Nkosi

I know there’s a fire and brimstone God that lives somewhere in the Bible. I also know that there is a God of kindness, a God of forgiveness, a God who knows we are just human and doing our best, even on days when we don’t.

Because that’s what good TV does. It captures you and holds you hostage. And then it ends, but you still want more, so you end up writing one of your longest blog posts about it while you grieve characters you only knew for 26 episodes across 7 years.

We talk a lot about not caring what other people think of us. Yeah, but that’s for Agnes down the road. Not the people we invite into our lives, not the people we share ourselves with.

It has given me a greater appreciation of the sameness and difference of African communities. It feels new yet not entirely, and feels familiar, yet not entirely. I have been sitting blissfully in that paradox for most of this year.

It is also important that I add a disclaimer: ANGIKAPASI! This is not a guarantee of any grade or result. This is more about the research journey, to make it easier, to make it less scary, to make it softer!

Sometimes I wish I could give a disclaimer to the people that I met after. The ones who didn’t know me before. I sometimes want to say that I wasn’t always as cynical or I once had more to give or if you had met me earlier, I swear you would have loved me. But death takes something from you

In all this, I only ask that you remember me. It sounds like a ridiculous
request but life has a habit of going on even under the worst of
circumstances. One day you will try to remember the sound of my
laughter and you won’t.

I could have worn crop tops every day for the 4 years I was at that school and I would still end up here. Not here as some abstract idea, but here, on this day, writing this to you. Because in the end, we never truly regret the big things.

We roll out red carpets and shower confetti for the most basic reasons. We praise parents for providing for their children, we commend spouses for their fidelity. We stand in awe when kids display perfect manners. Men are “good” for not being predators…the bar has got to be higher!

You don’t need to sell romance to me. I hear it. But I am saying other relationships are equally important. I am saying denying people integrity simply because we are not attracted to them is crazy business!